I met a man recently who was very discouraged with his life.
He felt as if his family was taking advantage of him and not giving him the love or appreciation that he felt he so greatly deserved.
He even referred to himself as "The Hired Hand."
This man had carried this "hired hand" image of himself in his mind for many years.
As a result, his family life became unbearable. He viewed his family as takers and refused to receive any love from them.
His anger grew and his resentment towards his family grew. It became increasingly apparent that he did not want to be around them, but he also would not leave or let them go. He chose, in his mind, to live a life unbearable to himself and to his family.
It was very destructive.
His wife had tried for many years to understand his anger towards her. His children did not understand why Dad was always mad, mumbling and storming off to another room or out out the house slamming the door behind him.
Many tears were cried. The pain was often unbearable and fear of the next angry episode was a prominent fixture in the home.
Why did this man feel this way about this family? Why did he feel like their hired hand? What was inside of this man that would not allow the love of family into his heart?
Perhaps he is missing a loving relationship with God as His Father in Heaven?
Without the proper understanding of God's plan for his life, this man is doomed to live in the torment and pain which resides in his mind and rules his family life. This man is missing a true relationship with God - the One who designed and created mankind, families and all of creation for His own glory and in His image.
I believe that as Satan seeks to destroy families, he goes wherever he can to instill "reverse thinking" into the minds of God's unsuspecting children.
It is never part of God's plan for a man to believe that he is the "hired hand" for his family.
In fact in God's plan for families, the husband and father has a very special role in loving and nurturing his wife and children.
God has given us many Scriptures to show us the role of the husband and father in a family. These include:
Matthew 19:5 states: Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.
A man who is a father (even if a step-father) is to love, provide for teach and chasten his children.
In Deuteronomy 6:5,2,6-7 it is written:
“Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength”. “So that you, your children and their children after them may fear the LORD your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”
A man is the spiritual leader of the home. If he is not walking in the ways of the Lord, he will surely fail. His family life will be miserable and he may end up divorced and living alone.
In Scripture we learn about Joshua. In Joshua 24:15 it is written: "If it is disagreeable in your sight to serve the LORD, choose for yourselves today whom you will serve: whether the gods which your fathers served which were beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living; but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD."
I believe we can see that the "hired hand" image that this husband and father carries is projected into his mind by the evil enemy of God.
This man feels that his family is to serve him instead of him serving his family in love, provision, teaching, spirituality, compassion, kindness and giving of himself for his family. His family is a gift from God, but he just doesn't see it right now.
As Satan sits back laughing at the destruction that he brings to families, the word of God and God's plan for our lives in never ending and forever unchanging.
Husbands and fathers can reverse the ungodly thinking that is controlling their minds and their lives.
This husband and father can reverse his thinking and seek the word of Our Father in Heaven every day. By focusing on love and giving, instead of receiving, his life will change for the better. He will find his wife and children love him and that he truly loves them.
The expectation, frustration and destruction brought on by Satan's tool of "reverse thinking" will be diminished and put behind the man who is now seeking God first.
As Jesus said as he was being tempted by Satan in the garden at Gethsemane, ... "Get you hence, Satan: for it is written, You shall worship the Lord your God, and him only shall you serve. (Matthew 4:10)
It is my prayer that men love their wives as Christ loves the church. Focus on God daily and feed yourself with His love and His word, and begin to live a life full of His joy and fulfillment which He intends for those who love Him and who seek to live in His ways.
Glory to God, Our Father in heaven for His love and the gifts he bestows upon us in our spouses, children and families.
In Jesus precious name, Amen.